December 3, 2020

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AfricaTopForum – News Around Africa

CONFUSION: It’s International Men’s Day and also World Toilet Day; who will save suffering men?

3 min read

Photo: Kakamega Governor Wycliffe Oparanya arrives at Gusii Stadium for this year’s Mashujaa day celebrations, it turn out the two ladies accompanying him are county officials and NOT his wives has had beed widely shared. Oparanya is an empowered man who should use his office to empower boy child too!

Lift a Fellow Man Today and Every Day.
It is International Men’s Day. For some sinister reason, the UN decided it should be World Toilet Day as well. Goes to show you what the world thinks of Men.

During the International Women’s Day, and Mother’s Day and other days dedicated to women, newspapers dedicate acreages to f space to women causes. But on the two days dedicated to men, no newspaper spares even a thought to men.

I have not bought a paper today. But I am sure there is nothing in the papers dedicated to men. Not even a beer or whiskey brand wishing us well. Not an insurance company, or a gas station wishing us well. Nothing. Meaning, we mean nothing to the world. Probably the last piece on Men’s Day was written by me back in 2014.

We are taken for granted and that is why we are all tripping.
Would you be kinder to a fellow man? Would you be courtesy? Would you lend a helping hand?
One day, I was so broke and a friend was buying me drinks. I told the friend, rather than buy me a drink, give me the money as bus fare, and my friend told me, “Mimi si bibi yako.”

Ten years later it hurts me. I find it problematic that I have friends who can buy me an 25 year-old mzinga but will catch a fit if I told them to give me the Sh 20,000 for some niggling problem. I know it is unmanly to extend financial help to a fellow man, but it is one rule we can change.

Let us be real. Let us talk depression. Let us talk suicide. Let us talk about how the economy has done a number on men and the repercussions.

Until men, stand for fellow men, we will continue to sink.
Recently I was in a training. And when the time for exams came, I heard the trainers tell women in class, “nyinyi msiogope, mtapitishwa. Wanaume ndio uangushwa.” That statement has disturbed me to date. I am not against helping women and I am the number one champion of Affirmative Action. But this must never be at the expense of men. It is possible to lift men and women at the same time.
But man to man, if there is one thing you can do this year and going forward, is to check on your friends. Ensure they are doing well.
This year I hit rock bottom, and if not for friends, male and female, I would have died.
So reach out. Talk these things. Know what is ailing your friend who is drinking too much. Know why your friend why suddenly disappeared from social media. Hear out when your friend tells you he is being stressed at home.

Let us have these conversations, however difficult and uncomfortable they are.
Because talking and every help, small and big goes a long way.
Here is to a great day. And thanks to women who understand our pain and extend a helping hand. Thanks for friends who are always there. You all make one hell of a difference…

And to men hurting, take it from me, there are brighter days ahead. If you can hope and trust in God.

By Silas Nyanchwani via Facebook